Sonic the Hedgehog: Classic Tales
by ZappuelLightnin'Rod
Summary: This is the story of a Blue Hedgehog who must continuously save the world from the evils of Doctor Ivo Robotnik. In this WACKY adventure! Join Sonic as he takes down Robotnik's forces and meets all new (Not really) characters! Like Miles "Tails" Prower! Or Knuckles the Echidna! Or Amy Rose! Or Princess Elise! Wait, she's not supposed to be in this story, get her outta here!
1. Prolouge

Sonic the Hedgehog slowly woke up. He scratched the back of his head and looked around. He was currently in Green Hill Zone. He looked to his left and then to his right, and then he realized, "Aw, great. I'm in another Fanfcition..."

The Blue Hedgehog got to his feet and he noticed that he was not alone. A human was standing about 10 feet away from him. Not that he could really tell. The human had no nose or ears. His eyes were green, but there were no no whites in his eyes. He had a single torso piece, which was yellow and had a lightning bolt on it. His hair was black and was, oddly enough, in the style of a large square. Seriously, it's like he had a giant black block on top of his oversized head. He was also just as tall as Sonic.

"Hello, Sonic. Welcome to my story" The Human said.

"Ah, so you're the author." Sonic said in response.

"Indeed. Name's Josh. Any questions before we get this thing going?" The author asked him.

"I can ask questions about this fanfic before I go into it?" Sonic asked

"Yep."

"How many?" Sonic asked

"As many as you want." Josh responded.

"Alright. Can I not be it?"

"Nope."

"Darn it. In that case, which continuity we going for? Archie? X? Fleetway"

"Mainly games, but we will be taking stuff from all other continuities." Josh explained.

"Ah, you're one of _those _fans, I see." Sonic said, semi-annoyed.

"Yep. Any other questions?"

"This gonna be a comedy? Action? Or one of those Romances were I get laid?"

"Comedy/Adventure. I'm not gonna get you laid in this story. Hate those kinda stories. They're just weird." Josh replied, comically in the most deadpan voice he could muster.

"Ah, Good. I assume that we start off really comical, but later on get serious." Sonic said, relived.

"Yes. When the stories get serious, there will still be funny parts still."

"We gonna break the fourth wall a lot?"

"Besides this opening chapter, not much. By the way, you will forget this chapter even happened. I'm making it not-canon to the story."

"Alright, good to know. May I ask the plot?"

"Mainly just an adaption of the classic games with a modern twist." Josh said, "You know Sonic 1, 2, 3&K, CD... all those good ones."

"No moderns?"

"I plan Rush and Adventure eventually." The Author said, smiling.

"Alright, Am I gonna act out of Character?"

"You are gonna have a deep hatred for your Modern self. You're currently Classic Sonic."

Sonic looked at himself and, indeed he was his classic self. "Okay, good to know. Anyone else gonna be in this story?"

"Oh, you better believe it." Josh said, smugly.

"Am I gonna be a Butt Monkey?"

"Not as much as other characters, but yes."

"Aw, man. We gonna plug anything during this thing?"

"Shamelessly." Josh said as he drank an Ice cold Pepsi while wearing a T-shirt that said, "Go and watch HellfireComms BrainscratchComms Chuggaaconroy, ProtonJon NintendoCapriSun TheRunawayGuys and SuperSkarmory"

"Alright, now do you have a role in this story? You like my sidekick? The main character?"

"I will be in the story, but I will most likely be a gag character. Only appearing every so often for a joke. Not gonna have too much impact on the main story. But due to this, I'm evoking Mary-Sue powers."

"Mary-Sue level..." Sonic said, wanting an answer.

"Mayor of the city, Billionaire, Got a hot girlfriend, the ability to control most of reality, most of that stuff." Josh said, bluntly.

"Ah, God-Mode Sue." Sonic said, satisfied with that answer.

"Yes. Basically. Now then any last questions before we enter Sonic 1?"

"Think you could hook me up in a sweet place during the fic?"

"Nope. The only reason I'm evoking Mary Sue powers is because I'm the author and I don't appear to much."

"Okay. So, I'm gonna go and beat Robotnik Down?" Sonic said, pointing behind himself.

"Absolutely, just be as funny as possible, buddy." Josh said smiling.

"No problem. Hey, when are we gonna see you again?" Sonic asked after turning around.

"Probably right before Sonic 2." Josh replied.

"Okay, good. By the way, so far, you're not a bad fanfic writer." Sonic said, complimenting the author.

"Eh, The only reason you're saying that is because I let you in on what you're getting into before you get into it." Josh said in a friendly tone.

"That is not a lie." And with that, Sonic ran off to deck Robotnik in the face.

"I'm gonna enjoy writing this, aren't I?" The author asked himself. The answer, as of this chapter, was yes. Yes he was.


	2. Chapter 1 Green Hill Zone part 1

Sonic ran through the fields of Green Hill Zone. He had recently heard that some mad genius named Dr. Robotnik had been kidnapping Animals and been putting them into his evil machines to take over the world.

Clearly, he was more crazy then smart, but he would never hear the end of Peta's whining if he succeeded. So, Sonic decided to take him down before he was able to ruin his life from the constant news about how, "Peta had saved the day by killing 49 people!"

Well, that and he wanted to be a hero, but it was mainly the Peta thing.

Sonic continued to run until he saw something coming straight for him. He wasn't sure what it was, but once thing's for sure, it was gonna hit him in the face if he didn-

*POW*

...Never mind. Sonic got up from the ground to see what had hit him. It was some sort of Robot, but Sonic summed up what it looked like in his first canon sentence of this fanfic.

"Why is that ladybug riding on a motorcycle?"

The Ladybug on the motorcycle then vroomed it's engine, having every intention of turning this hedgehog into a fur rug, it not realizing that Hedgehog's do not make very good fur rugs.

It raced towards Sonic. But this time Sonic was smart and jumped upon it's back, now riding it like it was a motorcycle. "WHOO! I'M RIDING A MOTORCYCLE AT THE AGE OF TEN! IN YOUR FACE FONZIE!" Sonic said, the author wanting to make sure that you know that Sonic's canon age in Sonic 1 is 10.

The Hedgehog looked upwards and saw a giant blue bee-like robot that was flying down towards him. It stopped in mid-air, keeping itself in the sky with it's robot wings and pointed it's stinger at him. Sonic looked upon this, when all of a sudden it started to fire bullets out of it's thorax.

Sonic jumped up into the air in order to dodge this and the bee robot shot the motorcycle ladybug instead, it somehow exploding as if it were in a film directed by Micheal Bay.

It was not until the other robot blew up until it noticed that there was a blue hedgehog on it's head. "You're paying for that you know."

The Bee robot aimed it's stinger gun at Sonic and fired it. Unfortunately It's head was in the way. Sonic jumped off just as it's head exploded. He aimed for a small rope and wooden plank bridge right below him.

He _aimed_, keyword.

Sonic had fallen into the water below. He did not stay there for long though as he quickly flew out of the water, screaming in pain. He landed on the other side of the wooden bridge, with a face of pure pain.

"Ow, ow, ow, ow..." Sonic said as he reached behind himself and pulled hard. "OWCH!" Sonic screamed as he finally got the item that was causing him pain off of his rear end. It appeared to be a Piranha robot. And it tried to eat him by swinging itself into Sonic. It failed.

"I don't care if you're made of metal, when I get home, I'm putting you on the grill."


End file.
